


The Trials and Tribulations of Antidepressants

by castiel_lawrence



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Begging, Bottom Bucky Barnes, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Crying, Depressed Bucky Barnes, Domestic Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Medication, References to Depression, Sexual Frustration, Sexual Tension, Smut, Top Steve Rogers, i might be projecting whoops, ruined orgasm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-16 18:26:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28586439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/castiel_lawrence/pseuds/castiel_lawrence
Summary: *cw: vague mention of anti-depressants and their side-effectsBucky recently started medication, and it's been helping in every area but the bedroom.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers
Comments: 4
Kudos: 56





	The Trials and Tribulations of Antidepressants

**Author's Note:**

> I know this is jsut a Stucky fic on AO3 but I want you to know: No one really talks about how much antidepressants can affect a person's sex life. You're not broken if you have trouble with your sex life on anti-depressants or in general! I hope this gives you even a sliver of insight, solace, or normalcy today. <3

“Steve… S-Steve, please keep going!” Bucky squirmed under Steve’s weight, relentlessly pushing back onto his cock.

Steve’s forehead was slick with sweat as he continued thrusting steadily. “I gotcha, just relax, okay?” he said, smiling with a heavy breath. “You’ll get there, baby.” Steve lifted Bucky’s leg and connected his thigh to his shoulder. He made a point to fuck him deeper as Bucky whined, reaching for his cock. 

“Please please please please please!” Bucky was nearly sobbing. They had been going for longer than usual. Bucky had started new medication, and it was severely affecting his libido. He was fully capable of getting hard, and he could enjoy the act of sex, but he couldn’t cum. Nothing was working- not his own hands, certainly, and not even Steve. Bucky was pent up, and he was pissed. “Come on!” he hissed through his teeth, throwing his head back as he stroked, oversensitive and teary-eyed.

“Hey, hey,” Steve said, slowing his thrusts to Bucky’s dismay. “Relax, Buck, please…”

Bucky squeezed his eyes shut. “I want to cum,” he stated with some embarrassment. He tried to push back as he did before, but Steve placed a hand on his hip.

“Do you want to try something else? You don’t look like you feel any better...” Steve said understandingly, Bucky took a deep breath. Steve was hardly concerned with his own state; he knew Bucky had been struggling, and he wanted to help.

Bucky bit his lip and thought for a moment. Usually, he had to fight the urge to cum when Steve was inside him. “I want you to keep going… but can we, uh… can we try the vibrator?” he asked, still stroking himself lazily. Steve nodded and opened the bedside drawer hurriedly. 

He turned the vibrator on. “Which setting?”

“I don’t fucking care, please hurry, Stevie…” Bucky said as nicely as he could. Steve turned the vibrator up three settings and pressed it directly on Bucky’s cock, and he keened in response. “Ah, more, that’s good!”

“Yeah? Does that feel better?” Steve asked, pushing a bit more for emphasis. He ran the vibrator up and down Bucky’s shaft and began pumping in and out of him, slowly at first.

Bucky nodded furiously. “Yes! Fuck, don’t you dare stop!” His eyes were screwed shut in concentration as he let the vibrations rack his body. He let out whines and broken moans as Steve sped up his thrusts. 

“You know, the last time I heard you moan like this was when I really gave it to you back when we were kids…” Steve said quietly, as if he was talking to himself, just loud enough for Bucky to hear. “I had really given it to you a few nights in a row and you were all worn out… Still so beautiful like this, Buck.”

“I-I don’t remember,” Bucky said. It was painful for him to admit. That memory meant something to Steve, and he didn’t have a clue it had even happened. The little details of his life were only just beginning to come back to him. 

“That’s alright, Buck. I’ll help you remember sometime, okay?”

“O-Okay. I’d- fuck!”

Steve suddenly turned the vibrator up to its highest setting, and Bucky whimpered. He fisted his hands in the sheets and let Steve control his body, control his pleasure… 

“Steve, I’m close!” Bucky said, half exhausted, half excited. “Keep going, I can feel it, baby, please!”

“Shhh, it’s alright, just focus…” Steve bit his lip in concentration and pounded into Bucky as hard as he thought he could take, drawing punched out moans and cries from below him. “You got it.”

Bucky’s breath hitched, and he felt himself cumming as Steve switched from the vibrator to his hand. He felt the drops of cum hitting his stomach and thighs, but he felt nothing more than a shiver in his body. A fucking ruined orgasm. 

“Fuck!” Bucky wailed. He curled in on himself, pushing Steve away with his posture. He felt no better. Honestly, he felt worse. 

“You didn’t feel it, did you?” Steve said kindly, placing a hand on Bucky’s shoulder. Bucky shrugged it off. “Hey,” Steve said with calm intonation. “It’s alright, doll, we both tried-”

“I’m fucking broken,” Bucky said, wiping his forearm over his eyes. 

“You’re not broken, Buck, it’s just the side effects-”

“Well, they’re a goddamn pain.” Bucky sat up and swung his legs over the edge of the bed. He rushed to the bathroom, his shoulders hunched. He kept talking as he ran a towel under warm water. “I’m never gonna be able to do what we used to do in bed, it’s fucking hopeless-”

“Bucky, it’s really okay,” Steve said calmly as he chased after Bucky. “I don’t fault you for anything.” Steve sighed as he watched the frustrated Bucky clean himself up.

“Look, Buck- They’re working. I see you smile more every day. You’re… you’re starting to remember things again. Hell, you ask _me_ if we can leave the house. We can get through this. And there are other options we can try if things don’t get better.” Bucky aggressively chucked the towel in the hamper. “Just… promise me you’ll keep taking them.”

Bucky exhaled and leaned against the bathroom counter. “I know they make me feel better… I just want this part of life to feel like it used to…”

“It’s not forever, sweetheart,” Steve said, guiding Bucky back to the bedroom. He reluctantly followed, still slightly embarrassed by the whole ordeal. “We can talk to the doctor about it the next time, and if there’s anything she can do, she’ll let us know. I don’t think you’re broken, your body’s just working on your brain right now.”

“And not my dick?” Bucky said with a smirk as he pulled on a large sweatshirt.

“And not your dick,” Steve repeated. 

“Well, my _stomach_ is hungry,” Bucky said, carding through his dresser drawers for a pair of pants. “Can we order in, or do you want to go out?”

“Hmmm, you pick.”

Bucky smiled. “Let’s order in. Fancy Italian?”

“I don’t know, pretty expensive…” Steve tsked sarcastically.

“Steve Rogers, if you order me that high-end mushroom ravioli, I will give you the best blowjob of your whole fucking life.”

“Consider it ordered.”


End file.
